Some men look for a mother figure in a relationship.

How to Know If Your Boyfriend Wants a Mother Figure

by Sharon O'Neil

As some relationships evolve, one partner may take on the role of the nurturing caregiver as the other becomes more dependent. Being a loving provider is an easy role for women to fall into since many are accustomed to caring for children and handling household responsibilities. While some women enjoy taking care of their partner, others find this type of relationship unbalanced and unfulfilling.

1. Play Time

Men who focus on play and avoid responsibility may long for a mother figure who will encourage their child-like love of fun. They may even ask permission to engage in recreation or pout if you try to put a stop to it. If you have children, you may notice he plays with them for his own enjoyment more than theirs. If his play time interferes with job duties or household chores, he may have trouble taking accountability for his actions because he was "just having fun."

2. Taking Care of Business

If your boyfriend looks to you to handle all important decisions, he may be placing you in a mother-like role. If you ask for his input on serious matters, he may shrug off your request and leave it all up to you. You may even find he tries to get you to handle his personal business, such as setting appointments and paying bills.

3. Making It All Better

Some men miss the nurturing love of their mother. Your boyfriend may look to you to fix all his problems and comfort him when he is down. He might seem clingy and emotionally needy. When you are down and look to him for support, he may not be able to help you because he is so absorbed in his own issues and expects you to be the strong one.

4. How His Mommy Treats Him

Take some cues from your boyfriend's relationship with his mother. See if you notice his mom coddling and babying him. Watch his response to see if enjoys the way she treats him. He may frequently go to his mother for advice and guidance. You might feel his mother's presence even when she is not around if he spends a lot of time talking about her.

5. Moving Forward

If you believe your boyfriend is looking for a mother figure, you should decide if this is the type of relationship you want. You may have concerns about his ability to handle responsibility or to be strong when you need support. Let your boyfriend know how you feel and have a conversation about both of your expectations for the relationship.

About the Author

Sharon O'Neil has been writing professionally since 2008. Her work has been published on various websites, including Walden University's Think+Up. She has worked in international business and is a licensed customs broker. She is currently a supervisor with a social service agency that works with families to prevent child abuse and neglect. She obtained a Bachelor of Science in business from Indiana University.

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