Bridging the gap between friendship and dating is a tricky and often unsuccessful situation that many people find themselves in, however inadvertently. When the friend that you are interested in may also be a bit quirky, shy or downright weird, getting her to think of you as more than just a friend requires that you treat your friendship differently to change up the status quo between you. While there is no guarantee that your friend will fall head over heels for you, there are ways that you can intrigue her to better your chances that she'll consider you more than "just a friend."
1. What Makes Them Weird?
Your friend's shyness and weird tendencies may work hand in hand to keep others from approaching him. Your friend may have been picked on, bullied or ostracized for his passions, causing him to shy away from others. Whether your friend is a geeky poet, loves anime and comic books or is hiding a sizable toy collection, the qualities that make your friend weird may also make him feel like he can't identify seriously with you or others who don't share his passions.
2. Bridging the Gap
Showing an interest in those things that interest your friend may help to bridge the gap between friendship and dating. If your friend is into anime, ask her to introduce you to her favorite series; if she is an aspiring artist ask to join in on open mic night. Showing a genuine interest in your friend's hobbies may develop a bond between you that can make a dating relationship possible.
3. Dressing the Part
Once you've shown interest in your friend's passions, look at the people that your friend has shown interest in previously. Does your friend typically go for hipsters wearing skinny jeans and glasses? Does he take an extra glance at girls with pink hair and leather jackets? Chances are your friend's romantic interests reflect his or her hobbies and personal interests. While you may not want to dye your hair pink to gain your friend's attention, consider giving his or her style preferences a thought if you want to get an extra glance the next time you two are together.
4. Be Upfront
If your friend is shy, there is a chance that he or she may have feelings for you already, but is afraid to act on them out of fear of rejection or humiliation. Take a leap of faith and tell your friend exactly how you feel. Putting your emotions on the table for your friend to see could open the door to becoming more than just her best friend.
- Journal of Personality and Social Psychology: Let’s Get Serious: Communicating Commitment in Romantic Relationships
- Psychology Today: Geek Love
- Journal of Social and Personal Relationships: What is love? An Empirically-Based Essentialist Account
- Journal of Social and Personal Relationships: Young Women's Attachment Style and Interpersonal Engagement With Female TV Stars
- Journal of Social and Personal Relationships: ‘Similarity Breeds Liking’ Revisited: The Moderating Role of Commitment
- Journal of Social and Personal Relationships: Social Reaction Styles, Interpersonal Behaviours and Person Perception: A Multi-Informant Approach
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