Let him know you love him.

How to Confess Your Love to a Man

by Kathryn Rateliff Barr

When asked who is more likely to confess their love in a relationship first, study participants voted most often for women, notes the article "Let's Get Serious" in the “Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.” In truth, though, the man is more likely to confess his love first -- up to six weeks early, reports the same article. When confessing your love, use both actions and words to express your feelings.

When to Speak

A man is more likely to want to hear that you love him for the first time before the two of you have sex, reports the authors of "Let's Get Serious." If you say it during a post-coital haze, he may wonder if you really mean it. Also avoid your first declarations of love when you’ve been drinking and during passionate sex, suggests the Cosmopolitan website.

Say It Right

Make that first profession of love face to face rather than via email, social media, or text or over the phone. Let him see the love in your eyes, whether you whisper it or shout it. After saying it for the first time, leave a love note in his briefcase or clip a note to the visor of his car repeating your feelings. Call him during his lunch break to let him know how much you care. If he’s planning to travel, stash a love note in with his toiletries or call him to tell him how much you'll miss him and what you plan to do when he returns.

Loving Actions

Both men and women may find it easier to show love through actions than through speaking the words, advises psychotherapist Barton Goldsmith, in “10 Ways to Say ‘I Love You’ Without Saying ‘I Love You.’” Listen to him when he opens up about his feelings and past traumas and offer affection in response to his confessions. Snuggle and share affectionate touches during the course of the day. Support his accomplishments and let him know how proud you are of him. Engage in small acts of kindness and let him know you appreciate what he does for you.

You’re Different - Love It

Encourage him to spend time with his friends and to have interests apart from you, suggests psychotherapist JoAnn Magdoff in “7 Ways to Tell Him You Love Him Without Words” in “Redbook.” Support his dreams with positive reinforcement, suggests psychologist Alon Gratch in the same article. If he wants to backpack through the Appalachians, get him a backpack, tent and hiking shoes over the course of several special occasions so he knows that you support his efforts to reach his goal.

About the Author

Rev. Kathryn Rateliff Barr has taught birth, parenting, vaccinations and alternative medicine classes since 1994. She is a pastoral family counselor and has parented birth, step, adopted and foster children. She holds bachelor's degrees in English and history from Centenary College of Louisiana. Studies include midwifery, naturopathy and other alternative therapies.

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