Academics and romance can mix well.

How to Go From Flirting in Class to Dating

by Lauren Vork

When it comes to meeting dating prospects, the college classroom has its advantages. Classmates are more likely to have shared interests and similar backgrounds, and the shared academic experience gives you something to bond over. For this reason, moving to seal the deal with a flirtatious classmate is an ideal dating choice in terms of ease, a gradual process and a high likelihood of success.

Body Language

Sometimes, behavior that may seem like flirting might just be a good way to pass the time in class. Before making overtures to dating, determine whether her flirting indicates a genuine interest by examining her body language. According to psychologist Jeremy Nicholson, Ph.D., it's important to act only if her body language indicates that she's comfortable with you rather than on her guard. "(She) will lean in to you more, make more eye contact, and smile. (She) will start to 'open up.' At this point, (she has) switched to a promotion focus," Nicholson writes. However, if her body language remains stand-offish and reserved during class, it may be premature to try to move things outside the classroom.


Begin the transition from communications during class to hanging out socially by engaging with him outside of class on a matter related to class studies. Do a group project together, if possible, or ask if he'd like to study with you for a test. This may be a one-time thing, but if you feel like you'd like to give him a little more time to get to know you, look for a reason to arrange a few study sessions.

Hanging Out

If everything's going well during study time, invite her to hang out with you socially in a casual manner. This might include accompanying you to dinner on campus or joining you and some friends for an on-campus event. This is an extra smooth move if you can invite her to join you for something that you're going to directly after a study session.

Asking for a Date

As soon as you've broken the ice socially, ask him for a formal date outside of school. Make your intentions clear by choosing a date location that's somewhat formal or is associated with dating, like seeing a show or concert. Use language that indicates this is a romantic dating gesture, such as, “Would you like to go out with me to ...” or “I'm going to this event and I don't have a date. Would you like to join me?” Keep a casual, confident air even if he declines. This will help avoid any awkwardness between the two of you during class time in the future.

About the Author

Lauren Vork has been a writer for 20 years, writing both fiction and nonfiction. Her work has appeared in "The Lovelorn" online magazine and Vork holds a bachelor's degree in music performance from St. Olaf College.

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