Feeling dissatisfied at the start of your marriage may be a sign of marital conflicts to come.

How to Know if You Are Not Happy in Your Marriage Anymore

by Kristen Moutria

You most likely began the journey of marriage with high hopes, a heart full of love and overwhelming emotions of happiness. However, even the most close-knit couples face tough challenges that may threaten the closeness of marriage. How can you tell if you are going through a tough time in your relationship that you can overcome, or if you are genuinely unhappy in your marriage? Losing feelings of trust and affection for your spouse may demonstrate authentic marital dissatisfaction.

You Never Communicate

Not communicating with your spouse may demonstrate marital dissatisfaction. Denver psychologist Susan Heitler states on WebMD.com that if you do not talk about your problems with your spouse, tension and the distance between you will only grow. You probably are unhappy with your marriage if you feel the need to walk on eggshells around your spouse for fear of upsetting him. Without healthy and frequent communication, a marriage will never be fulfilling, since it is through sharing your vulnerabilities that you create intimacy.

You Do Not Agree on Important Issues

If you and your spouse continuously argue about important fundamental issues or beliefs, you probably are not experiencing a fulfilling marriage. According to Professional-Counselling.com, a warning sign of an impending break up is if you and your spouse cannot come to an understanding or agreement over important issues, and you end up feeling hurt and frustrated when you try to discuss them. If the two of you do not see eye-to-eye on something fundamental, such as a religious belief or whether or not you agree on having children, you will face constant struggles that will strain your relationship.

You Feel Neglected

You are most likely unhappy in your marriage if you experience a general feeling of being neglected by your significant other. Psychologist Willard F. Harley reports on MarriageBuilders.com that neglect is a common reported reason for divorce and includes both emotional and physical abandonment. If your spouse refuses to talk to you about struggles you are facing, or if he is no longer interested in a physical connection with you, you will be left feeling empty and unfulfilled.

You Don't Feel Appreciated

You need to feel admired and appreciated in order to stay happy in any relationship, and especially marriage. Marriage and Family Therapist Sharon Rivkin reports on WebMD.com that you will feel lonely, unappreciated and neglected if your spouse does not do simple things for you such as saying hello when he comes home from work, or acknowledging that you cooked his favorite meal for lunch. If your spouse never thanks you or makes time in his schedule to be around you, you may feel taken for granted and as a result, unhappy in your marriage.


  • The Walk-Out Woman : When Your Heart is Empty and Your Dreams Are Lost; Steve Stephens, Alice Gray
  • The Power of Two: Secrets of a Strong & Loving Marriage; Susan Heitler
  • Psychology Today: Will Your Marriage Last?

About the Author

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

Photo Credits

  • Maria Teijeiro/Photodisc/Getty Images