Letting the tears flow is the first step to starting your new life.

How to Start a New Life After Heartbreak

by Kristen Moutria

If you have just had your heart broken, you may wonder if you will ever be happy again. Heartbreak is something everyone deals with at some point, but this does not make it any more bearable. One of the most painful things in life is loss, and losing contact with a person you love can be devastating, according to Lisa Firestone, clinical psychologist, in the "Psychology Today" article "Why Break Ups Really Hurt." While being honest with yourself about the pain is important, recognizing that what you are feeling is not forever is important as well. You may find the breakup to be a blessing once you discover your new life after heartbreak.

Let the Tears Flow

A breakup can cause you to feel crazy. It is important that you let yourself mourn the loss of what felt like a significant relationship in your life. You must forgive yourself for what feels like weakness, according to clinical psychologist Suzanne Lachmann in the "Psychology Today" article "How to Mourn a Breakup to Move Past Grief and Withdrawal." She explains that you may experience extreme emotional symptoms of grief, but that these feelings are normal. The sooner you let yourself cry and recognize what you lost, the sooner you will be able to start your new life.

Reinvent Yourself

After you have let yourself cry and grieve over the end of your relationship, it is time to focus on what inspires you. Inspiration may be the last thing you expected to feel following a breakup, but it may be what gets you through. You have the opportunity to make a "new you" during this empty time. At least once a week, you should set aside some time to do something you love, according to Lisa Steadman, author of "It's a Breakup Not a Breakdown." Perhaps you have always wanted to join a salsa class or try yoga. These small activities will give you a new sense of purpose and bring variety to your life.

Set a New Goal

Now that you are not "tied down" to any particular person or relationship, set a new goal in life that you have plenty of time to focus on. If photography is something you have always wanted to get into, make it a goal to at least test your skills during this upcoming month. If you have wanted to run a 5k but have not had the time for it, you now have the opportunity to train with devotion. While you probably had life goals before, you didn't have as much time as you do now.

Make New Friends

You can replace your old relationship with new ones that energize and inspire you. Making friends is a way to feel restored and understood during this time in your life. You never know how these friendships will enhance your life, states Steadman. Furthermore, friends can actually improve your sense of self-worth. Arming yourself with several inspiring relationships will allow you to enjoy your new life post-heartbreak.

About the Author

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

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